Shruew: Difference between revisions
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== RS-shruew == | == RS-shruew == | ||
shruew - co-founder of [[Ranger Squad]]. The 's' in shruew is always lower case. | shruew - co-founder of [[Ranger Squad]]. The 's' in shruew is always lower case. Noted for his ability to kill fish with his mind. | ||
== Controversy == | == Controversy == |
Revision as of 13:35, 21 October 2008
RS-shruew
shruew - co-founder of Ranger Squad. The 's' in shruew is always lower case. Noted for his ability to kill fish with his mind.
Controversy
According to Talisman, he is known to be a "pompas ass." shruew has been unavailable for comment.
shruew would like to make his official response now -- "Testicals. That is all."
shruew dearly hopes this ends our nations tragedy.
The Congress of the Cow has formally banned ass pompary within Ranger Squad.
Mating Habits
When it is time for a shruew to mate, they let out the call, "pew pew pew!" Further research has proven this to be false. shruews reproduce asexually. Or, at least they attempt to two or three times a day.
Rumors of Testical Size
It is rumored that he has one giant ball and one normal sized ball.
Noted Inventions
Is a noted inventor having created Ultimate Secret Super Power and Atomic Super Lasers from the Future.
Literay Genius Recognition
Widely recognized as a literary genius with such characters as Captain Hamington, Takeda Manamoto and of course, the epic tribute to ham - 101 Haikus About Ham.
Possibility that a Cellphone Can Make Pancakes
shruew is presently infatuated with the possibility that cellphones can make pancakes.
Hatred of Belize
shruew shocked the political community during a recent campaign speech where he discussed his intent to rule the entire world in peace, but with the exception of "Belize, those fuckers are on their own!"
shruew's campaign advisers have been unavailable for comment. The government of Belize however, declared Oct 15th a new yearly national day of mourning called - Shunned by shruew Day. Or, in the native parlance, "Evitado por el dia de shruew."
Eternal Love
On Oct 17th, 2008, shruew informed that world that he was enternal love. Any feelings of love felt throughout the world is directly because of shruew's gift to the world. He is enternal love, he gives enternal love, you owe him your enternal love (he also accepts cash).
Clown Transportation Needs
Requires a vehicle that can transport more than 14 clowns.