1.
Oh dear, I hunger
Is there no solution here?
Indeed, I eat ham!
-shruew
|
2.
Place it in a can
Market it to the masses
Spread the word of ham
-shruew
|
3.
It was a good one
A honeyglazed perfection
Sad now, it is gone.
-shruew
|
4.
Serve this masterpiece
Enjoy the sweet glazed topping
A spiral sliced joy
-shruew
|
5.
Hickory smoked ham
Serves 96 grams of fat
One serving is all.
-shruew
|
6.
Fresh, cured, dried, smoked ham
Too many choices to make
Give me one of each.
-shruew
|
7.
Boneless ham for you
Means less ham for me to eat
That's why you must die
-shruew
|
8.
Ham ham ham ham ham
All I can think about is:
Ham ham ham ham ham
-shruew
|
9.
Honey-spice glazed ham
Is ready to serve at once.
Delightful for you!
-shruew
|
10.
Ham peppered bacon
It is not a proper ham
Yet, it's very good
-shruew
|
11.
Love, Sex, Fame, Power
These are things people are after.
I just want some ham.
-shruew
|
12.
Muslims don't eat ham
It's not considered halal.
I will eat their ham.
-shruew
| |
13.
Clowns crying in blood
Streets flooded with dead bodies.
Hope - we call you ham!
-shruew
|
14.
I awake from sleep;
A new day beckons me to come.
Breakfast ham for strength.
-shruew
|
15.
Why am I obsessed?
ham. BAM! ham. BAM! ham. BAMBAM!
TAKE ME TO YOUR GOD!
-shruew
|
16.
Regrets in our lives.
Looking back at my life I
Should've had more ham.
-shruew
|
17.
Mexican wrestlers,
Colorful costumes and acts.
Not as good as ham!
-shruew
|
18.
Before or after
Before ham or after ham
Ham is the center
-shruew
|
19.
Oh, say can you see?
By the dawn's early ham-light
I eat tons of ham.
-shruew
|
20.
Sometimes I think that
The sun is just a giant ham
Honeyglazing Earth.
-shruew
|
21.
When it's time to go,
When it's time to bury me.
Bury me in ham.
-shruew
|
22.
Co-pilot Chewy,
You have never eaten ham.
You should try some soon.
-shruew
|
23.
Vegetarian,
I do not fear what you eat.
For it is not ham.
-shruew
|
24.
In certain cultures,
It is legal to marry
Dry-cured, not brined, ham
-shruew
|
25.
If Hitler ate ham,
All the world would be German.
Again, ham saves all.
-shruew
|
26.
Through being cool now.
I have no ham and it hurts.
I WILL get some ham!!!
-shruew
|
27.
Fabio Testi
You starred in a movie once
Did you eat ham there?
-shruew
|
28.
Hamburger, you lied!
There is no ham in your meat!
Stop using that name!
-shruew
|
29.
The Code of the Ham:
Live Free, Eat Well, Do Good and
Honeglaze evil.
-shruew
|
30.
In the Middle East,
They don't eat a lot of ham.
That explains a lot....
-shruew
|
31.
This ham has spoiled.
Wasted in the frigde, it rots.
Tragedy unfolds.
-shruew
|
32.
Bacon is not ham.
Do not be confused on this.
Breakfast ham is best.
-shruew
|
33.
This country is free.
Founded on the premise that
Ham should be consumed.
-shruew
|
34.
Pigs are known as the
Philosophers of the farm.
Eat their ham and learn.
-shruew
|
35.
Let the silence soothe.
Enjoy the starry night sky.
Embrace nature's ham.
-shruew
|
36.
Oh, Holiday Ham,
How I wish you were year round.
Instead of just now.
-shruew
|
37.
World hunger abounds.
People are starving to death.
They should get some ham.
-shruew
|
38.
You must be able
to survive at any cost.
Keep the ham coming.
-shruew
|
39.
It has come; the time.
Worthless! Worthless! All the time!
Ham shall set me free!!!
-shruew
|
40.
The Pork Chop Express
Delivers ham to the world;
delivering joy!
-shruew
|
41.
The meaning of life
really has nothing to
do with ham. It should!
-shruew
|
42.
This is a haiku.
It is about ham and stuff.
It's not very good.
-shruew
|
43.
Zombie death clowns die!
You cannot steal all my ham!
I'll rip your hearts out!
-shruew
|
44.
To live forever.
To never hunger or thirst.
That is ham's promise.
-shruew
|
45.
Blood sausage for all.
Nazi clowns slapping children.
A future ham saved.
-shruew
|
46.
If it is not love,
Then it is the ham that will
Bring us together.
-shruew
|
47.
No words can describe
The honeyglazed joy of ham.
That's their own problem.
-shruew
|
48.
Your Dad left you young.
Your mother gave you away.
Ham was there for you.
-shruew
|
49.
Why does ham perplex?
What mystery does it hold?
No one can be sure.
-shruew
|
50.
Gladiators of
meats and fish welcome to my
Arena of Ham!
-shruew
|
51.
I know of a place
Where ham flows freely for all.
In my dreams, at least.
-shruew
|
52.
More than half way done.
My testament to ham is
very much on its way!
-shruew
|
53.
Oh Lord I'm so hot.
Heating on the roasting pit.
Apple in my mouth.
-Drake
|
54.
Baked fried or roasted.
Perfection in each serving.
Oh ham I love thee!
-Drake
|
55.
Endure, Persist, Live.
You must carry the burden.
Supplicate to ham!
-shruew
|
56.
Grossman is no ham!
A can't honeyglaze a win!
Get back to produce!
-shruew
|
57.
Hear the rain splash down,
Fallen tears from unseen gods.
Ham has left heaven!
-shruew
|
58.
Glorious desire,
Ramifications of love.
Sacrifice for ham.
-shruew
|
59.
Ham's no reprobate.
No eternal damnation
For the Chosen Meat!
-shruew
|
60.
Ham's like a snow flake,
Each bite a unique flavor.
Each bite a marvel!
-shruew
|
61.
Witch Doctor of Ham,
Do what you can for that boy.
Your ancient plague cure.
-shruew
|
62.
Ham Paladin can
Save you from your inner fears.
Repent and rejoice!
-shruew
|
63.
Sunshine; morning dew.
Celebration of senses.
Ham rises the sun.
-shruew
|
64.
What's in my pocket?
Meaty, gentle, tasty fun!
Of course, it is ham!
-shruew
|
65.
I like my ham like
How I like my girls to be:
Gold, glazed, sliced...uhhh wait.
-shruew
|
66.
Politics to save
Us from life's many troubles.
Infuse ham. Repent.
-shruew
|
67.
When all else fails you,
When all hope in life fails you,
Ascend to the ham!
-shruew
|
68.
You cannot stop me!
Children looking at the throne
Don't know ham rules all!
-shruew
|
69.
Putrid man get back!
Homeless man without a plan;
Stay away from ham!
-shruew
|
70.
Rub ham on your loins.
Insert it in some places.
Just keep that secret!
-shruew
|
71.
Sometimes I wonder
What life would be without Ham
I dare not dream it
-Bear
|
72.
My desperation;
The trials of life take hold!
Find solace in ham.
-shruew
|
73.
Let's think about ham.
Contemplate its special taste.
At awe in it's glow!
-shruew
|
74.
Was it all a dream?
Ham flowing like uncorked wine,
I'll never wake up!
-shruew
|
75.
Everyone loves Ham
Except for Chillybilly
He should be beaten!
-bear
|
76.
To have New Year's joy,
Ham must be consumed wisely -
Use moderation.
-shruew
|
77.
Ranger Squad loves ham,
we love it with a passion
ham is our lifeblood
-GenG
|
78.
Ham is quite godly
Ham is inebriating
Ham is life itself
-GenG
|
79.
ham is god's lesson
ham is better than school is
ham is just super
-GenG
|
80.
Ham is good on bread
even better on women
it is always good
-GenG
|
81.
The clock struck seven
I was almost late for ham
but on time i was
-GenG
|
82.
Eggs with my breakfast
Turkey for my late lunch-break
Ham with my dinner
-GenG
|
83.
the sun is shining
a great golden ham glowing
lights the universe
-GenG
|
84.
Owning at my games
playing most delightfully
with ham at my side
-GenG
|
85.
Music was playing
furniture was strewn about
my ham was stolen
-GenG
|
86.
Money can't buy love
money can't buy happiness
money bought me ham
-GenG
|
87.
God gave men, women
god gave women the kitchen
God gave all great ham
-GenG
|
88.
Soldiers were marching
without rest they keep going
I gave them some ham
-GenG
|
89.
I have a fever
There is one prescription out
it's honey glazed ham
-GenG
|
90.
Snow was a falling
temperatures were dropping
ham i was eating
-GenG
|
91.
we had us some ham
Giberish had none with him
We did not share it
-GenG
|
92.
The new year has come
The old year has passed us by
Ham is forever
-GenG
|
93.
I walked up my stairs
When i beheld something great
Ham awaiting me.
-GenG
|
94.
I love my music
But when i have a headache
I eat ham instead
-GenG
|
95.
GenG loves his Ham
Certainly not more than shruew
Ham is in his blood
-[[Bear}
|
96.
The stars above shine
Down upon the Earth like ham;
Night time honeyglaze.
-shruew
|
97.
Soon this will all end.
The tribute to ham will stop.
I will cry that day.
-shruew
|
98.
Eat it! Eat the ham!
Don't make me have to kill you!
You WILL eat this ham!
-shruew
|
99.
Take us home to ham.
I've been away far too long.
Rejoice in its brine.
-shruew
|
100.
If there is no God,
then we must have faith in ham.
For it is divine.
-shruew
|
101.
This is not the end.
This shrine will last forever.
A tribute to ham.
-shruew
|
Epilogue
Lo, too late to post!
The Thread's Ragnarok has come
Yet ham: eternal.
-Silent700
|